Corrupt A Wish game

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nanomekia
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Post by nanomekia »

Granted. They then hate you when they realize the pot of gold is actually a pot of brown gold.

I wish I could figure out somewhere to put these stickers I want to stick on things.
Writer. Translator. Player of games. Only bites when asked nicely.

"That's ten pounds of yikes in a five-pound bag."
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keenmaster486
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Post by keenmaster486 »

Granted. You stick them on your head and are laughed at all week.

I wish I could get some fellas together for a band.
I flermmed the plootash just like you asked.
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mortimermcmirestinks
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Post by mortimermcmirestinks »

Granted. They thank you for introducing them to each other and go off to form a band without you.

Can there be an incorruptible wish? Hmm... I wish all living things were dead and everything was terrible.
...says the most charming guy in the room.

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keenmaster486
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Post by keenmaster486 »

Pfffft.

Granted. Turns out you actually survived, and have to endure the terribleness alone. Otherwise everyone would be dead and wouldn't care.

I wish I had perfect hair.
I flermmed the plootash just like you asked.
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Levellass
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Post by Levellass »

Granted, you had perfect hair exactly three months, nine days and six hours ago. Pity it's not perfect now.

I wish all the raindrops were candy drops and gum drops. (Oh what a rain that would be!)
What you really need, not what you think you ought to want.
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nanomekia
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Post by nanomekia »

Granted. They melt in the sun after the rain stops and everything is covered in layers of sticky, sugary goo.

I wish I wasn't ill.
Writer. Translator. Player of games. Only bites when asked nicely.

"That's ten pounds of yikes in a five-pound bag."
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Post by Keening_Product »

Granted. Just granted - your situation sounds awful.

I wish Australia would become a republic already.
Keening_Product was defeated before the game.

"Wise words. One day I may even understand what they mean." - Levellass
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nanomekia
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Post by nanomekia »

Aw, thanks mate. :)

Granted. They promptly fall into a 'MURICA-style situation with their very own Trump-alike.

I wish I was less prone to panicking. (Cats. Fleas. Need I say more.)
Writer. Translator. Player of games. Only bites when asked nicely.

"That's ten pounds of yikes in a five-pound bag."
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mortimermcmirestinks
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Post by mortimermcmirestinks »

Granted. You are 0.0031% less prone to panicking. Doesn't make much difference.
keenmaster486 wrote:Granted. Turns out you actually survived, and have to endure the terribleness alone. Otherwise everyone would be dead and wouldn't care.
Oh, it's on now.

I wish all living things (including me) were dead and everything was terrible and nobody cared.
...says the most charming guy in the room.

I'm back... kind of? Not really.

You can also find me here.
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keenmaster486
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Post by keenmaster486 »

:mort

Granted.

Nobody cares about everything being terrible in the physical world since they're all dead and in the spiritual world now, in which they have to face the judgment of the Almighty. Half are thrown into hell while the rest are resurrected and have to live in the terrible physical world again, except since they don't care about it they aren't miserable, but neither do they ever again experience any joy or happiness. The end result: they spend eternity being freaking bored.

I wish that base reality would cease to exist.
I flermmed the plootash just like you asked.
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mortimermcmirestinks
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Post by mortimermcmirestinks »

Granted. The base of reality ceases to exist, but the rest of reality doesn't, so everything does the equivalent of what happens to the stuff on a table when all the table's legs collapse, except on a universal scale.

Let's try this again...


I wish all living things (including me) were irresurrectably dead and everything was terrible and nobody cared, in all worlds, physical and spiritual.
...says the most charming guy in the room.

I'm back... kind of? Not really.

You can also find me here.
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Levellass
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Post by Levellass »

Granted.


A void. Through it spins the corpses of a trillion trillion stars, cold and dead, lumps of iron and carbon. Orbiting many are the shells of dead worlds, lifeless lumps of rock. On their surfaces the crumbled and cold remains of a endless eccosystems. There is no life in this place, no light. Just unending darkness and silence.

This is a dead place, an expanses of exhausted potential. Across all of its expanse everything, everywhere, on all planes of existence has ceased to be. Entropy has won its long battle with energy, leaving the latter spread thin across the vacuum.

And with this is something else. The thin spread of matter and energy is accompanied by another, more ethereal entity Once, once it was something that called itself spirit, soul. Now it too is stretched thin, spread and jumbled. Heaven and hell themselves have decayed, and the dead within them. After an endless eternity of no sight, no sound, no change, the minds and souls of all that had ever lived have shattered under the crippling monotony, the endless hopelessness.

Here and there a few formless, substanceless shades cluster, separated by only a few billion light years. Once, long ago, one a blue and green world a race of naked apes had lived. Some had diverted themselves from this inevitable fate with brightly colored electric lights flashing on screens. None of the faded souls remember this, there are no lights now, no words, no colors. 'Keen' is a sound, a symbol that long ago ceased to have meaning, even before that planet's star has expanded and boiled away its oceans.

All the collected souls knew, drifting alone in eternity, was that something, some unknown quality they lacked the sanity, he ability to even fathom anymore, some quality had once bound them, long ago. But that was then. Now there was just the endless darkness, a horror and misery of unimaginable magnitude, stretching on into eternity. The souls did not know this, dd not care, for these things had been lost to them far before the last star had faded. All they could do was exist, float in the absolute cold and *feel* Feel the terribleness, the hopelessness, the utter and total despair of all that now was,everywhere. And silently, without body or mouth or sound,

To scream.



I wish that when sports teams lost games they just truthfully admitted they sucked instead of coming up with load-of-bull excuses.
What you really need, not what you think you ought to want.
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keenmaster486
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Post by keenmaster486 »

OK Lass. You win.


Granted. They are burned at the stake by their fans, and as the flames climbed high into the night to light the sacrificial rite I saw Satan laughing with delight the day the ball players died.

I wish I could press a button to go to sleep and then wake up at a set time.
I flermmed the plootash just like you asked.
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Post by nanomekia »

Granted. The button malfunctions and you sleep through the most important day of your life, hence causing your own downward spiral into oblivion.

I wish my skin was a bit less dry.
Writer. Translator. Player of games. Only bites when asked nicely.

"That's ten pounds of yikes in a five-pound bag."
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mortimermcmirestinks
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Post by mortimermcmirestinks »

keenmaster486 wrote:OK Lass. You win.
Freakin' seconded.
nanomekia wrote:I wish my skin was a bit less dry.
Granted. You melt.

I wish that I hadn't challenged Levellass.
...says the most charming guy in the room.

I'm back... kind of? Not really.

You can also find me here.
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