This must be a savanna, judging by the dry looking grass and limited trees.
This game still has one of the best plots that I've heard in a video game, with or without the story.
"I don't know what has happened to me. I'm in a place like none I've ever seen before."
Maybe this is where Sesame Street is!
...
...Wait, no.
"I remember taking notes at the stone wall. I then began to feel dizzy. I remember sitting down to rest. After that it's all a blur."
...Yeah, if most people want the rest of the story about how he got here, I'll include it in the next post.
"Malvineous begins his journey in this bizzare world"
Technically he began it as soon as he woke up, but we'll let that slide.
Our first level!!... ...Why am I on this random platform?...
...
...Who cares? LET'S GO!!
Eat lasers, you fowl... Two legged... beaked... ghoulishly green... thingamajig.
I always thought this was an oddly shaped gun type thing, and that Malvineous held it by the tall side (even though he has no shooting animation), but now that I look at it, I realize it's supposed to be no more than an uppercase L with a laser on it. I like my idea better, though. >:
Remember this, people. This will be important to note later.
It hurt my hand to take this picture because I had to stretch my fingers across the keyboard to take it. You're welcome.
I may never try to take a picture and crouch at the same time ever again.
"TOO LATE TO TURN BACK!"
That's quite misleading. You can go outside this place as easily as you can go in.
Kidding aside, I don't think turning back would be the first thing to come to my mind if I was unwillingly teleportaled (yes I did just say "teleportaled") to a different dimension.
Here's our exit! We're out of here! Let's go to the ne-
WE INTERRUPT THIS LET'S PLAY FOR AN IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT.
MALVINEOUS RETURNS TO THE MAP, SHOCKS PLAYERS EVERYWHERE.
Some people have reported a man named Malvineous Havershim has escaped from a land known as "Level One" to his home in Map, in his homeland Epic England. Police report that he also left his diary behind, and it contained mysterious messages like:
And:
This is all evidence that the man has forgotten what his home looks like. Further research is yet to be conducted.
WE NOW RETURN YOU TO YOUR REGULAR LET'S PLAY.
Funny, I thought he was already in another dimension.
RAPID FIAR!!!
These are your lasers on awesome. Without the awesome, they become recolors of the awesome lasers.
A new enemy!... He says "woah" every time I shoot him.
Good thing I'm used to that.
By the time I was done taking this picture, these collectible caterpillar bits had vanished. You're welcome.
Trying to take this picture resulted in me having one hit point left. You're welcome.
Also, that bee with the 25 on him is evidence that there were more. Or that I lit my 25 shaped laser pointer on him. You decide! (hint: it was the former.)
IN SOVIET RUSSIA, WELCOME ARE YOU!!!!
...I had to say that. By the way, I got the key and beat the level.
"I've been here nearly three days now."
I guess time is just a lot faster for him, huh?
"Surely if this was a dream I would have awoken now."
Malvineous has a good point here, but he's forgetting that time seems to slow down in dreams... Although, probably not that much.
Don't worry, Malvineous, if you die, you'll just respawn at the beginning of the level.
Let's save here because you can only save on the map.
More of this excellent game next time.
EDIT: Forgot the intro Image!
You crack me up little buddy!